Feeling Overwhelmed

I have had so much going on with classes that started up this Monday and having appointment after appointment and all these dates planned. Unfortunately, so far, only Shannon has pulled through with our plans. I have been swimming and spending time with friends as well, when I have the time. A few of my other dates didn't come through, but I'm not sure if I trust that they're genuinely busy. I'll see tomorrow because I have two dates planned after school.

So, I have been on two dates with Shannon in the past two weeks. It has been a blast! The first date was a little iffy for me because I wasn't sure if she was doing this out of obligation or simply because she had planned to. We watched 'Splice' & it was so much better than I imagined. It's not really a horror film like it is portrayed to be. I thought it was really good with a solid story line regardless that some pieces were predictable. The whole time she seemed to be warmed up to me and I was glad that my anxieties were beginning to fade. Afterward, it was getting late so she took me home.

Yesterday, she took me swimming with a friend of her's after we had a "healthy" dinner of pizza. Really, I don't like pizza, but it can be good sometimes and this time it was a nice surprise. I figured that I have been doing some good work with my body and eating quite healthy so maybe it wouldn't be totally detrimental. After going swimming, which was very fun (although I was pretty disappointed that her friend was so flaky going back and forth from her phone to the floaty and not really swimming), but Shannon kept me pleased and entertained. Then she drove us out to the really nice theater to see 'Grown Ups'. It was packed! People were lining up everywhere to wait for the premier showing of the new Twilight addition - it was ridiculous! It's very very very disappointing to barely have the capacity to read a book series that has been so overly-hyped to find that it's the most horrible thing that you've ever struggled to lay eyes on. Yet half of the American population eats it up like candy-coated brownies and feeds the conformity machine of a true pre-teen author's nightmare!!! Seriously? Can we cut the crap already?? Anyway, 'Grown Ups' was soooo fun to watch and it kept both of us laughing the whole way! Quite the Summer comedy movie treat! :D

By the time the movie was over I was feeling very drained and she took me home. I really enjoyed spending time with her yesterday. Don't get me wrong, she's a funny, enthusiastic and lighthearted girl, but I'm beginning to wonder if I spend time with her for the right reasons. To be honest, much of the time that we have alone, I feel rather uncomfortable with. Yes, I am dating to find my sexual preference, to have fun and to find romance, but do I enjoy her as a person? I definitely do...but if I enjoy her enough is the question. That may sound messed up, but that is how I feel. I'm not sure if this is me (I know it's not her - she's an all time down for anything, fun-loving girl) or if I would feel more comfortable around someone else.. Maybe she's too fun?? Sometimes, I feel like we don't have enough in common and there tends to be a lack of conversation because I don't know what to talk about. She was supposed to call me back today to fill me in about our up-coming plans, but so far she hasn't. I do hope that she gets back to me and here's to hoping that we'll have a crazy fun summer experience together! :D